Homeworks

[Clem 1,241]

Hello guys,

I have an English homeworks to do for tomorrow, it's a dialogue, if someone can help me to correct it, it wouldbe awesome.

 

They ask me to do this :

 

"Think about what news technologies have changed when it comes to corporate communication.

One of you only sees the advantages & the other, only the drawbacks, mention at least 4 means of communication"

 

Here the works I did with a friend :

 

X : Good morning ladies and gentleman, welcome to the DDB TV show where we deal with debate.

Today, we have with us, Ms Ana, who work in Mango as a seller and Clement a bookkeeper.

They will both explain their own point of view of New Technologies.

 

Clement you work everyday with a computer and you also use it at your home.

You really like news technologies, whereas, you, Ana, you have to work with it, but you don’t see any iinterest.

 

So let’s start, with Clement.

 

C : Hello, yes new technologies changed my way of life.

Wheter for work or for everyday life, I use it.

Such as my mobile phone which is connected to my apple watch that allow me to communicate anywhere & anytime even to send mail for my job.

 

20 years ago, it wasn’t possible to do this.

We had to pay alot for this.

 

A : I agree, but there are some drawbacks that you don’t mention like the short duration of the battery, delicatness, the network that work one quarter of times.

 

C : Do not forget that, new technologies allow us to do more things, meetings can now happened from a distance thank’s to the teleconference device unlike in the 60’s, meetings only happened face to face.

It’s beneficial when I work, because I can talk to my customers without moving from my office.

 

A : When I listen to you, I guess in 20 years, we won’t need to move anymore to do somethings.

Everyone will stay at home, no more sociable life.

Even at my firms, we are moving less & less since we use talki walki to talk instead the retailer.

 

C : On the contrary, it’s important for a company because employees are more reactive, it’s the best means of communication to be efficient.

 

A :

To sum up, despite the importance that news technologies bring us to the world, people only use this way to communicate & this numbers will raise up for the commings years.

 

C :

News technologies maybe takes more & more place in our life but without it, we won’t be able fo all this progress, such as medical one.

 

 

 

Thanks you in advance guys.

Edited November 29, 2017 by Clem

[thisisrauldo 801]

4 hours ago, Clem said:

Today, we have with us, Ms Ana, who works in Mango as a seller and Clement a bookkeeper.

 

A : I agree, but there are some drawbacks that you didn't mention like the short duration of the battery, delicatness, the network that works one quarter of the time.

 

C : Do not forget that, new technologies allow us to do more things, meetings can now happen from a distance thanks to the teleconference device unlike in the 60’s, meetings only happened face to face.

 

A : When I listen to you, I guess (that) in 20 years, we won’t need to move anymore to do anything.

 

Even at my firm, we are moving less & less since we use walk talk to talk instead the retailer.

 

C : On the contrary, it’s important for a company because employees are more active, it’s the best way of communication to be efficient.

 

To sum up, despite the importance that new technologies bring us to the world, people only use this way to communicate & these numbers will keep raising up in the coming years.

 

New technologies maybe will take more & more place in our life but without it, we couldn't be able to achieve all the progress that we've today, such as medicinal one.

 

 

Hiie dear Clem, I correct somethings but a few of them I dont know if they are right, so if someone else could check my correction it would be better for ya, and I'll write down here the underline ones, they are some of my doubts:

 

1. the (that) in this case i guess it isn't obligatory, but it sounds good to hear, I hope it doesnt change the meaning of what you wrote.

 

2. walk talk you mean those things people can talk to each other right? google it later, if it isn't just forget it x)

 

3. to achieve all the progress that we've today this one i complemented and reestructured it for you, I hope I didn't change the meaning of what you wrote again xD

 

I hope I could help ya and you do well with your homework, xoxo best prs you know 

 

PS: if you have any more doubts you can send me a message here or in the clan, ok?

[frostlion 77]

2 hours ago, thisisrauldo said:

 

 

Hiie dear Clem, I correct somethings but a few of them I dont know if they are right, so if someone else could check my correction it would be better for ya, and I'll write down here the underline ones, they are some of my doubts:

 

1. the (that) in this case i guess it isn't obligatory, but it sounds good to hear, I hope it doesnt change the meaning of what you wrote.

 

2. walk talk you mean those things people can talk to each other right? google it later, if it isn't just forget it x)

 

3. to achieve all the progress that we've today this one i complemented and reestructured it for you, I hope I didn't change the meaning of what you wrote again xD

 

I hope I could help ya and you do well with your homework, xoxo best prs you know 

 

PS: if you have any more doubts you can send me a message here or in the clan, ok?

 

Wow, look, a great English teacher here, nice work, ready to take a course

[Clem 1,241]

8 hours ago, thisisrauldo said:

 

 

Hiie dear Clem, I correct somethings but a few of them I dont know if they are right, so if someone else could check my correction it would be better for ya, and I'll write down here the underline ones, they are some of my doubts:

 

1. the (that) in this case i guess it isn't obligatory, but it sounds good to hear, I hope it doesnt change the meaning of what you wrote.

 

2. walk talk you mean those things people can talk to each other right? google it later, if it isn't just forget it x)

 

3. to achieve all the progress that we've today this one i complemented and reestructured it for you, I hope I didn't change the meaning of what you wrote again xD

 

I hope I could help ya and you do well with your homework, xoxo best prs you know 

 

PS: if you have any more doubts you can send me a message here or in the clan, ok?

Hello sir Raul, the best PRS of all over the game aha !!

 

Special thanks for what you did for me.

 

I really appreciate it .

 

I'll reward you in game as soon as i'm online.

 

Have fun bro.

[zozo17 4]

Hi Clem! Im an American friend of Mark, it looks good for the most part other then simple spelling mistakes. I'd recommend putting all of it in a spell checker (somewhere around 8 mistakes of spelling).

[BBuddy~ 203]

Here is my correction of it:

PS.: strikedthrough words/letters should be removed.

Bolded words/letters should be added.

Italic words are just commentaries about the correction.

 

 

X : Good morning ladies and gentleman, welcome to the DDB TV show where we deal with debates.

Today, we have with us, (remove comma) Ms Ana, who works in Mango as a seller, (Add comma) and Clement, (Add comma) a bookkeeper.

They will both explain their own point of view of about New Technologies.

 

Clement, (Add comma) you work everyday with a computer and you also use it at your home.

You really like news technologies, whereas, you, Ana, you have to work with it, but you don’t see any iinterest are not interested at all about it (I guess this sounds better).

 

So let’s start, (remove comma) with Clement.

 

C : Hello, yes new technologies changed my way of life.

Wheter for work or for everyday life, I use it.

Such as my mobile phone which is connected to my apple watch that allows me to communicate anywhere & anytime even to send e-mails for my job.

 

20 years ago, it wasn’t possible to do this.

We had to pay alot for this.

 

A : I agree, but there are some drawbacks that you don’t mention, (Add comma) like the short duration of the batteryies, delicatness, the network that works one quarter of times.

 

C : Do not forget that, (remove comma) new technologies allows us to do more things, (Period and capital letter) meetings can now happened from a distance thank’s (thanks) to the teleconference device, (Add comma) unlike in the 60’s, when meetings only happened face to face.

It’s beneficial when I at work, because I can talk to my customers without moving from leaving my office.

 

A : When I listen to you, I guess in 20 years, (remove comma) we won’t need to move anymore to do somethings anything.

Everyone will stay at home, no more sociable life.

Even at my firms, we are moving less & less since we use talki walki walkie talkie to talk instead to the retailer. (I'm not sure if I understood what you meant here)

 

C : On the contrary, it’s important for a company because employees are more reactive, it’s the best means of communication to be efficient .It's better if the mean of communication are more efficient.

 

A :

To sum up, despite the importance that news technologies brings us to the world, people only use this way it to communicate & this these numbers will raise up for the commings years.

 

C :

News technologies maybe takes more & more place in our life but without it, we won’t be able ready for all this progress, such as the medical one.

 

 

Edited November 30, 2017 by BBuddy~

[thisisrauldo 801]

2 hours ago, Clem said:

Hello sir Raul, the best PRS of all over the game aha !!

 

Special thanks for what you did for me.

 

I really appreciate it .

 

I'll reward you in game as soon as i'm online.

 

Have fun bro.

 

HAHAHAHH x) you're welcome bro <3 and no need rewards at all, I'm glad to help you  Good luck!!

[Clem 1,241]

On 30/11/2017 at 10:58 AM, zozo17 said:

Hi Clem! Im an American friend of Mark, it looks good for the most part other then simple spelling mistakes. I'd recommend putting all of it in a spell checker (somewhere around 8 mistakes of spelling).

 

Alright

thanks you dude :)

[Clem 1,241]

23 hours ago, BBuddy~ said:

Here is my correction of it:

PS.: strikedthrough words/letters should be removed.

Bolded words/letters should be added.

Italic words are just commentaries about the correction.

 

 

X : Good morning ladies and gentleman, welcome to the DDB TV show where we deal with debates.

Today, we have with us, (remove comma) Ms Ana, who works in Mango as a seller, (Add comma) and Clement, (Add comma) a bookkeeper.

They will both explain their own point of view of about New Technologies.

 

Clement, (Add comma) you work everyday with a computer and you also use it at your home.

You really like news technologies, whereas, you, Ana, you have to work with it, but you don’t see any iinterest are not interested at all about it (I guess this sounds better).

 

So let’s start, (remove comma) with Clement.

 

C : Hello, yes new technologies changed my way of life.

Wheter for work or for everyday life, I use it.

Such as my mobile phone which is connected to my apple watch that allows me to communicate anywhere & anytime even to send e-mails for my job.

 

20 years ago, it wasn’t possible to do this.

We had to pay alot for this.

 

A : I agree, but there are some drawbacks that you don’t mention, (Add comma) like the short duration of the batteryies, delicatness, the network that works one quarter of times.

 

C : Do not forget that, (remove comma) new technologies allows us to do more things, (Period and capital letter) meetings can now happened from a distance thank’s (thanks) to the teleconference device, (Add comma) unlike in the 60’s, when meetings only happened face to face.

It’s beneficial when I at work, because I can talk to my customers without moving from leaving my office.

 

A : When I listen to you, I guess in 20 years, (remove comma) we won’t need to move anymore to do somethings anything.

Everyone will stay at home, no more sociable life.

Even at my firms, we are moving less & less since we use talki walki walkie talkie to talk instead to the retailer. (I'm not sure if I understood what you meant here)

 

C : On the contrary, it’s important for a company because employees are more reactive, it’s the best means of communication to be efficient .It's better if the mean of communication are more efficient.

 

A :

To sum up, despite the importance that news technologies brings us to the world, people only use this way it to communicate & this these numbers will raise up for the commings years.

 

C :

News technologies maybe takes more & more place in our life but without it, we won’t be able ready for all this progress, such as the medical one.

 

 

Wow, your correction looks very good !!

But I had to send the work already

 

Thanks you anyways :3